Let’s just marry. Like, now?

So, you have heard that a local akhi is interested, and to tell the truth, you are too. You know that this person is a potential spouse. That you could happily marry them for their deen, their character and their (good) looks. They aren't exactly a God fearing Tom Cruise but alhamdulillah your standards are now, well realistic. Unlike before. Before you had secretly hoped that a mysterious man, perhaps the son of a scholar or even the Imam of Masjid al Haraam would propose to you and father would receive him with open arms. 

You are told that the brother wishes to meet with you and your family, however needs to know if you are willing to proceed. The ball is in your court, he eagerly awaiting your response. With joy you are screaming "Of course I want to marry you!", well, you aren't screaming in real life, this is just the voice in your head. Instead your lips are completely shut.You want to say yes but you feel that you can't. 

Why? 

You know that your parents are expecting a wealthy man. If he met this brother, you'd probably be told that his degree in Business studies means nothing. 

You are afraid that you aren't pious enough for him. That you may disappoint him with your cooking. You are thinking if you are actually emotionally ready for marriage. That you can't handle or remember all the rights and responsibilities. You anxious about leaving your parents home and starting a new life with this, well, stranger. Is he even the right brother? 

These are the types of things which worries which go through our heads as sisters. However it is time that we faced them in order to over come them. They are nothing but whispers from shaytan if this brother is truly fit enough for you to marry. Rasoolullah (SAW) encouraged us to marry young, yet too often we fall into the trap of imagining ourselves married when we are older, with careers and homes of our own.

May Allaah remove the anxieties from our hearts. 
Ameen. 

(Forgive me for the missing words or/and the spelling/grammar mistakes)


A very tired Umm Mus'ab.